New Out Look

I am pulling myself together and finding a new out look on life, my life has never been easy I've never had things handed to me nothing has ever come to easy to me. It's easy to fall into a pity party when you think about it. I am guilty of doing that from time to time. Hey I am an emotional girl, it happens! :)

However I look back at my life and I mean I really look back and no it's not been easy. It's not been fair, but do you know what I've always had? God, I've always known he's there. I've always had someone to talk to and even now when things are rough and sometimes I want to say he's gone he's not. I know he's not, because he's providing for me. Just like he always has. Another thing I've always had through out my life is a good core group of people who love me. A mother who would die for me, a grandmother who treated me like a princess always putting me first. A father who gave me the gift of family a step mother who I don't even call step mother because the word sounds too cinderella... She's mama and that's how she'll always be. She's loved me as her own child since day one. I've got sisters oh how I've got sisters and we've had our fair share of fights but the bond we share runs deep. I've also been given aunts and uncles and cousins who love me... That was just in my childhood now the list goes on. I've got a second dad who has done nothing but loved me since the day he married my mom. More Aunts and Uncles that have taken me as one of their own.. God really is good! Then he gave me my friends.. I have so many friends some that are second mothers, some that are big sister's some that are younger sister's but each one is a gift to me and I wish I could list all their names on here but it would take forever and a day to read them... You all know who you are and you all know I love you with all of my heart.

If that wasn't enough God gave me kids in my life to watch grow. Man some of them have taught me so much.. They hold my heart in a way no one else does. I love you kiddos.

God is great and even in the hardest times he's here I know he is. He's not left me. He hasn't left you either.. In your dark hours think about what you do have and you'll find him. He's waiting for you to turn back around and run to him... Well I am running to him.. I've missed him.

Today, some women said there was something special about Jenny and I when we were out on a walk, and it stuck in my mind all day... What's special about us is we have God in our hearts and in our lives and we are letting him shine..

I hope to continue to let him shine and be the best person I can be. Learn from my mistakes and grow...

Feeling blessed

Coming out of a storm

I know I haven't blogged in awhile, sometimes there isn't anything to say. Sometimes there is too much to say. You just never know. I know that right now it seems everyone that I love is going through some kind of hardship and it breaks my heart. My heart is in a million of pieces for those I love. For some of them it's just not one battle but several and it doesn't seem right or fair. It's hard to understand why these things are happening. I am just at a loss.. For my family and friends that are struggling right now with whatever is going on in your life please know that I think about you daily and I lift you up in prayer. You all mean the world to me.. Each and everyone of you...

As for my own life right now it too seems to be falling down around me and it's hard so hard to not let the darkness just consume me. It's hard to not feel alone all the time.. However I know there are worse things happening all over the world and people I love are going through so much more then I am. So I remind myself of what I do have. The most amazing support team ever. People that love me all the time for who I am. You are all amazing and I Cherish you. Long calls in the middle of the night, a good walk with a great friend. Sharing a cup of coffee with someone who builds you up all the time. Sweet emails and messages... A hug and a I LOVE YOU.... Is what is keeping me going.

As I write this tonight, I am fighting off a dark moment so I will go spend it praying for others.. But I just needed to find an outlet to my own thoughts....

GOD IS IN CONTROL..... That's what we all need to remember

Joy in others!

I just feel it on my heart to write this blog so I am going to go with it. You have to open your heart and loves others and animals. It brings more Joy to the soul then one could imagine. However you have to be aware that opening your heart to others is a risky business people aren't perfect. They are going to let you down. They are going to hurt you from time to time. However you must not shut down and lock your heart away from them. You rise up and you forgive and love the person. They won't always hurt you and they won't always fail you. In fact they'll build you up and love you and shape you into a better person. You have to remember that you're going to hurt them some day. You're going to fail them too and you need them to forgive you as you would do to them. Now I am not saying you keep forgiving an abusive person over and over again those are people that you need to block out. However not everyone is out to get you and not everyone is going to hurt you. Make wise choices on who you let in but once you let them in LOVE them with everything you have. I've herd some very sad stories the last few days of friendships ending and people passing away alone. Those stories break my heart.
Some people are born into wonderful families who love them and help them grow and stay with them for life. Those people are very blessed and I hope they don't take that for granted. Some people are not born into families like that for those people it's very important for them to go out into and find those people that are made into family. Friends are the family we pick for ourselves.

I am sometimes known as the naive one. The sensitive one. The overly perky in the early morning one. I had someone ask me one day how I did it. Here's what I told them. I find the best in every single person. I believe there is good in everyone. I practice what I believe I forgive and I try not to dwell on the pain. Being sad is easy to do trust me I am emotional I cry easily and my feelings can get hurt quickly but I've learned I have become so much happier by forgiving and loving the person. I am not saying I don't cry when I am hurt sometimes that's what I need to do to feel justified but then I move on but keeping my heart open to the person. I can not tell you how much love and joy is in my life and that makes the painful moments not so painful

As I said this was just on my mind tonight and I beg you all to reach out to your loved ones and let them know you love them. Or give your animals a hug and most importantly if you are in a feud own up to your part, learn from the hurt and forgive. Don't let it destroy a relationship.

Update update read all about it!

:)

How did it become June already? I can't believe it's taken me so long to update my blog. I am sorry!

Soo here's what is going on in my world. My parents relationship came to an end I never thought I would see that happen. However things happen in life that you just can't control and this is one of them. You just love the people. After all they are my parents. My mom has moved in with me and Its been going great! I love having my mom here!

I-pop update I wasn't able to come up with all the money I need so I won't be going this July however they hold onto what I have saved and it goes towards the next one. So I am going to go in January at first I was a little sad however it's all working out for the best. This year my sister has booked a flight to Nevada to spend with our grandparents and now I get to join her. My sister and I make it a goal to see each other at least once a year and we missed seeing each other last year so this is all working out.. As for i-pop for the next six months I am going to continue to fundraise and save money. It'll be fun when I get there!

There are so many great things happening this June I can't wait to see what comes from them..


Loving my life!

Loving my family!

Loving my FRIENDS!!!

Loving my job!

I am blessed!

Behind?

Oh dear, here it is half way through April and the last time I blogged it was March!! Where on EARTH did the time go? I really want to know, I would love to have some of it back!!

Life has been busy it's had it's ups and it's downs but you know it's my life and I am happy with it!

I got the biggest life lesson the past few weeks or so, my bestfriend from highschool mother passed away suddenly this year, and it really stopped me in my tracks. It slapped me and it stung. I never really took the time to see how short and special life is. It made me see how special my parents were. I sure do call my mom alot more! Don't let life pass you by with out telling your loved ones how special they are. Really you never know.

My heart goes out to her family, it's not something you just bounce back from. Still praying and loving them!

I can't think of alot to report on as busy as my life has been, but I would love to tell you all that I am here to pray for you. If you have any request feel free to let me know and I will be praying.

Thank you all for reading my blog..

Dreams

First Blog of March...

Most little girls dream of being a princess! Living a glitzy glittery life! Then the real world hits them and they start to dream about more realistic things. Mini vans husbands children and careers. I have to say I am no different, when I was little I dreamed of being famous person married to Prince Charming! As I got older those dreams turned into white picket fences lawns houses husbands and kids and the double garage doors! Here I am still dreaming of what's to come.

I am living a quiet single gal’s life right now, but today I realized that actually some of my dreams are right in front of me and I had no idea. There's no guy no garage doors no picket fences and no glamour... Or is there?

I work 6:30-3 Mon-Friday as a preschool teacher. Everyday I am around 15 small children. Some days are hard...So very very hard...

When I walk into the room after being gone for a short bit of time their eyes light up! They run to me! They call my name. They love me. To them I am the famous person that just walked in the room. I said I wanted the glitter of the world... All of my clothing sports glitter paint stains and my heart holds wonderful great memories of painting projects with the loves. I may not be married or dating right now, but I have a roof over my head. I have a car, I have a job. I have pets and I have a job where I get to snuggle with many little someone’s everyday.

As I said earlier today I've realized that my dreams are coming true each and every day!

With a happy Heart on this first day of March I wish you all a great month.. I hope that you too see your dreams are coming true around you!

A Big Chance!

Hi Friends!

I just recently auditioned for this amazing contest called iPOP and out of 200 or more so people that auditioned only about 30 or so people made it. I was one! It's very exciting to me! Now I get the chance to go down to LA and do one of my heart desires and ACT and have 100's of agents judge me and see me.. Maybe one of them would actually take me on! Wouldn't that be amazing! It's defiantly a once in a life time chance.

However it's spendy so I am trying to raise the money to go.

If any of you would be willing to donate towards it I would be for ever grateful, OR better yet for you if you need any type of service done I'd more then willing to work for it..

If any of you know me, like really know me you know how hard this is for me to ask. I MUCH RATHER give then ask..

This is a once in a life time thing and a dream I've had since toddlerhood...


Anything helps..

Even just encouraging words and support!

I love you!

you can contact me at

lilpiperjane@yahoo.com For further information!

Thank you!!