Don't Give In...I am not...

I believe we all have voices that attack us when we are down. Now I am not saying we are crazy just because we hear them. What I am talking about is that voice inside your head that weighs heavily on your heart and it tells you aren't good enough. You'll never be good enough.

I've struggled with this voice for years. It hangs around every day but is so much louder in times of hardship. If you allow it to get to you it bogs you down. It puts you in a funk it makes your heart to the point you thinks its going to break into a million pieces.

I am guilty of letting that voice get to me the last few days. I let it control me. I let it tell me the people that love me don't. I let it tell me that I am just not going to make it and I am not going to be ok. Then I start to shut down. I shut out the people that mean the most to me. I hide away and I hurt.

What good is that doing me? Why do I listen to that voice tell me that my friends and family can't love me. No I am not perfect and I have my flaws. My family love me even knowing this and I love them knowing they aren't perfect and i don't expect them to be. So why do I think that they can't love me?

I am the one that ends up suffering even more. I didn't give them a chance to help me.

I am taking an active step to not let that voice get to me. When I stopped and asked for help. When I showed my pain to someone that loved me. They didn't judge me. They were honest with me. They didn't put me down. Yes they told me some things that were hard to hear but I needed to hear. It give me a clear view. Helped me push the voice outside of my head.

The voice is still here but I am not letting it control me. When I hear it. When I feel my heart to start to get heavy. I close my eyes. Picture myself being as upset as this past few days and pray to God to help me be stronger. Help me to not feel that pain. I remember the words of wisdom I was given.

I take a minute and see all my blessings and I open my eyes and the voice is gone and I am stronger.

Life is NEVER going to be easy. Never EVER going to be easy.

However I refuse to let that little voice control my life.

I refuse to shut the people out of my life that love me. I will not be alone.

I will never abandon them so I can't think they will abandon me.

My God is So Great! So Strong and SO mighty! There isn't nothing my God can't do... It's a song we sing with our cubbies and it's been stuck in my head for days.. It's true my God gave me this life and My God gave me my group of people that love me... There is nothing My God Can't help me out of...

Becoming a Stronger me.. One day at a time!

Love you all!